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The Dangers Of People Pleasing-Living In A World That Wants You To Fit In When God Has Called You To Stand Out

As a Child of God, you will never be able to please the world and the Lord at the same time. You will go through trials and tribulations and people will mock you and ask you “where is your God”. People will be used by the devil (remember, our fight is not against flesh and blood) to keep your fire dim so you will become just warm enough to be spit out of the Father’s mouth and him declare he never knew you. These are things that I wish I was taught, but I believe it is exactly what he wants me to make you aware of. Our enemy is prowling around like a lion, ready to pounce on his next prey. We must be aware of his schemes and deceptions that have been the same since the very beginning of time.

As a people pleaser, the very first sentence probably made you shriek. I was once a people pleaser and without my heart being in check with the Holy Spirit it would be an easy trap to fall back into. But people are just that, people. What we want to be after is the heart of God. For a while I listened to a lie from someone that I trusted whom I thought honored and lived for God. He told me I was “too zealous”. At that time I was living a life that I wanted to please man rather than God. I feared what other people thought. What I did not know was that the purpose of the enemy’s lie through this person was to dim my fire so much that I would become complacent and start to regress back to a place where when I was met with that Father, he would say he never knew me.

The truth is, God want his children to be completely and utterly SOLD OUT for him! The Kingdom of God does not operate as the world operates so do not be surprised if your faith seems out of this world. That is because it is! God wants his children to be zealous. To be zealous means to burn with emotion, being red hot, spirit filled to serve the Lord. As I was warned to not be “ too zealous”, I am here to speak the truth in love. Be aware of not being zealous enough. Be aware of the schemes of the devil to try and put out the fire and love for God that consumes you. What he does not want you to know is that it is contagious and can set the world on fire for God!

Me listening to man’s opinion rather than the heart of God is where I went wrong. This seems so obvious to say but there is a reason why I must speak of it now. I was completely unaware of how the devil was using this person to plant seeds of doubt and mislead me. I have since this incident forgiven the person who spoke this and pray for him every single day. We must hear the heart of the Father louder than what the world is speaking. Some examples in scripture of how people pleasing can be so damaging can be found in the Psalms and life of King David.

“Because of my love for you, Lord,

I have been mocked, cursed, and disgraced.

Even my own brothers, those of my family,

act as though they don’t want anything to do with me.

My love for you has my heart on fire!

My passion consumes me for your house!

Nothing will turn me away,

even though I endure all the insults of those who insult you.

When they see me seeking for more of you with weeping and fasting,

they all just scoff and scorn at my passion.

When I humble myself with sorrow over my sin,

it gives them a reason to mock me even more.

The leaders, the influential ones—how they scorn my passion for you!

I’ve become the talk of the town, the theme of drunkards’ songs.

But I keep calling out to you, Yahweh!

I know you will bend down to listen to me,

for now is the season of favor.

Because of your faithful love for me,

your answer to my prayer will be my sure salvation.”

 -Psalms 69:8-13 TPT

The people closest to David, his family, and the most influential leaders were mocking him for his ‘zeal’. If David listened to man rather than God, where would we be now in history? If Noah never built the ark because he listened to others more than God, would we even exist? David continued to call out to God and lived a life that is now known generations later. What other people think reflects their heart. We will not be held responsible for what other people spoke to us. But, we will be held accountable on the motive of our hearts. Our perfect example, Jesus Christ flipped over tables because zeal for his Father’s house consumed him (see John 2:17). You can see that if we listen to man and do things based on people pleasing rather than being obedient to God, history could be a lot different than what it is now. Losing the fear of man is essential to fulfilling the purposes that God has had for you since the beginning of time.

My question for you today, I want you to prayerfully ask Holy Spirit.

What is your heart’s motive?

This blog is called Let Love Be My Motive because I want God’s children to rise up with the sole motive of loving God with all their heart, mind, and strength and loving others because we will be known by our love.

I write about people pleasing today because I have dealt with the ramifications of choosing what looks good in the eyes of man rather than what may look silly to man but is obedient to God. God wants us to drop the agenda of man, including ourselves and run with zeal, being sold out and passionately pursuing the purposes he has had for us since the beginning of time.

Will you join me in turning away from complacency and the fear of man, and turn in the right direction by boldly pursuing God with all your heart? Will you Let Love Be Your Motive?

More Scripture To Meditate On:

  • “I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot.So then, because you are lukewarm, and neithercold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth.Because you say,‘I am rich, have become wealthy, and have need of nothing’—and do not know that you are wretched, miserable, poor, blind, and naked—I counsel youto buy from Me gold refined in the fire, that you may be rich; andwhite garments, that you may be clothed, that the shame of your nakedness may not be revealed; and anoint your eyes with eye salve, that you may see.As many as I love, I rebuke andchasten.Therefore bezealous and repent.Behold,I stand at the door and knock.If anyone hears My voice and opens the door,I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.To him who overcomesI will grant to sit with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne. “He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.” -Revelation 3:15-22 NKJV
  • Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one! You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.“And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart.You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. –Deuteronomy 6:4-7 NKJV
  • For am I now trying to persuade people, or God? Or am I striving to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ. -Galatians 1:10 CSB
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Set Apart For A Unique Purpose

Over the past week I have talked to several different women who all are pursuing a relationship with God and want his will to be done in their life. God has given each of them a vision of what he wants them to do to benefit the kingdom. Some of them have normal every day jobs that have become their ministry, some of the women are being challenged to leave their job and go somewhere else, and other women God has said their ministry is in a church setting.

What I have come to realize is that each of the women I have talked to have a different purpose. A purpose that is individualized to them personally with their talents and passions woven in. It is really beautiful to think about.

No two people are the same. Each of us have their very own personality, strengths, abilities, and passion to bring to the table. God has made us as individuals with different make-ups to bring together as one to strengthen one another as a whole. There is no one in this world you cannot learn something from. There is no reason to try to fit in when God has called you to stand out.

This is why it is so important to be who God has called you to be, yourself.

He has crafted you to be his masterpiece. No true masterpiece can be duplicated. Be an original. You are needed here, right now, for a much larger reason than you or I can see.

Focus wholeheartedly on Jesus, live your life full of love, and ask for his guidance every day. You are perfectly imperfect and he wants every piece of your heart. He will mold you to be a world changer. Stop trying to fit in with the world when you are meant to change it with his love.

For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith; if service, in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching; the one who exhorts, in his exhortation; the one who contributes, in generosity; the one who leads, with zeal; the one who does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness.-Romans 12:3-8 ESV

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.-Ephesians 2:10 NLT

You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body

and knit me together in my mother’s womb.

Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!

Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.

You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,

as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.

You saw me before I was born.

Every day of my life was recorded in your book.

Every moment was laid out

before a single day had passed.

How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.

They cannot be numbered!

I can’t even count them;

they outnumber the grains of sand!

And when I wake up,

you are still with me! -Psalm 139:13-18 NLT